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8/4/19
"Such a struggle, hardship and risk and for what? Fifteen minutes on top with a pleasant summit picture and view if the weather is kind. That's the physical reality, for some, but I say it flippantly because it is not how I see it. Mountains do more than that. They liberate the soul and they free the mind from the chaos of life. They allow the imagination to escape and enable the body the chance to express itself in the natural world. Mountains are so simple and yet running through them is a complex and beautiful tapestry, woven together to allow humans to test the core of their spirit to its limits."

24.4.19
I'm getting tired of always asking myself why. There has been no indication of the answer. In fact all statements make me think truth exists on the opposition.

27.4.19
I went back and read my old blog, my first ever blog, about running. I was such a clever and smart girl back then. I wonder where that self-confidence went.

1.5.19
I feel like every time I start to find my vibe somewhere, and really start to find my people and places, I'm getting ready to leave.

4.5.19
As I enter my apartment I wish I am someone else. Someone free of the limitations I am currently putting on myself for no apparent reason.

7.5.19
They say you can always go home again. But as an expat I have learned that that statement is false. Home consists largely of the people you surround yourself with, and there is no guarantee that if you "go home" 2 or 5 years later they will still be there. And even if they are they will not be the same person as when you left. And neither will you. The goal is to find someone you can trust enough to adapt simultaneously with you and build your ever changing home, together.

8.5.19
If the world could just get its timing right for once that'd be really great....

9.5.19
The best dreams are yet to come.

17.5.19
I thought I knew who I was, and that meant I was finally ready to settle, but as it turns out I am still figuring myself out, and the real challenge is finding someone who will accept all those changes as they come. Are you ready?

18.5.19
I thought I was feeling sad about leaving weeks ago, but it turns out I'm actually devastated I'm leaving, and it hit me today, and now I'm sobbing in my apartment. Is this the beginning of the lasts?

25.5.19
Halfway to forever.

2.6.19
What is meant to be will always find a way to be. Kazakhstan was meant to by my home away from home and this friendship was meant to be just like this. At least for now.

11.6.19
Once you put words out in the world they are there to stay. I said them , and I meant them with all my heart, but the next words need to be goodbye.

18.6.19
Stressed. Not sure when the emotions will come, but I hope it's when I'm alone at home and not when I'm out in a large group of people.

19.6.19
I think it is very scary that not one single person knows all the sides of what is happening in my life at the moment. Tid-bits.

20.6.19
Once there was a girl who thought she was living her life filled to the brim. Then she moved and met amazing friends who showed her just how good life could be. And she grew and changed and became spectacular because of them.

So Long Kazakhstan

Song: The Edge by Amber Rubarth and David Peters

I'm about to become a sad sop of a mess. 3 minutes ago everything was totally fine, and now I cannot find any song to stop the tears. My body is in shambles: sore from my run yesterday, constant stomach pain, inability to sleep for several days now. I'm trying to remember the devastation of leaving Montenegro and my great dislike of Kazakhstan when I first moved here. But my feelings for this city are overwhelming.

What can I say to a place that has given me so much joy, and so many life lessons, and helped me grow in a multitude of ways. Thanks for the views, experiences, and smiles.

So long Kazakhstan!

Because I grew so much in Almaty, I thought I'd take some time to reflect on my goals for Abu Dhabi. I think my main goal is to continue to be who I was born to be. Nature enthusiast, and an active and healthy member of this world. I will continue saving money and continue to travel the world. I will love more aspects of my life, and be less anxious about my future. What is meant to be will find a way to be.

I want to put my all into my relationship and really find happiness in sharing a life with someone else. I will learn how to communicate freely rather than letting my emotions and annoyances bubble up inside of me.

For work I'd love to build stronger relationships with my students and try to promote more independence in them. I'm going to become a coach, and try to create action around the school. I want to learn to collaborate more openly, and take criticism as a way to build a better classroom.

Some smaller goals for the upcoming few years:
1. Run a Marathon
2. Climb Mount Kilimanjaro
3. Visit Africa! Step out of my comfort zone about where I go.
4. Be more environmentally friendly
5. Keep my life more organized and clean
6. Run an Ultra trail run(for a year or 2 from now)
7. Drink WAAAAAY less
8. Focus my "me" time, and "We" time-  less time on social media when out

Okay...so I have a lot of goals, but what other way is there to live life, than by constantly striving to be the best version of yourself.